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In today’s world, it’s easy to find things we dislike about ourselves. We are our biggest critics. It can feel normal to think so poorly of ourselves. We may blame ourselves constantly and always find reasons to be unsatisfied. You want to know how to love yourself.

It takes work and patience, but you can get there. We can feel sad if we desire another appearance or life situation. We need to rework our entire thought process to be positive, loving, and understanding. I know that you deserve those three things in your life. And you know it too.

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It’s time to stop bagging on yourself. You are an amazing person, and there will only ever be one of you. So, make yourself shine, rather than hiding your true self away! Show the world what they are working with. 

It can be hard to love ourselves if we are caught in insecurities. Everyone has them, and they’re normal. It’s okay to be insecure about certain parts of yourself. If it makes you feel more yourself to get change your style up, get aesthetic surgery, or tattoos, go for it.

You only have one shot at this life, and it’s a waste of time to spend it hating yourself. Although you can take steps to work out or change your appearance, at the end of the day, you are the same soul. What matters most is in your mind.

Self love is critical to our happiness. You have the power to foster that self love. By surrounding yourself with proper support systems, you won’t have to do it alone. Here are a few other ways you can start your journey to self love.

How to Love Yourself: Stop comparing yourself to others

Comparing yourself to others will never get you anywhere. It will just create a rabbit hole of reasons to dislike yourself. Everyone has different lives and different situations. We never truly know anyone else’s story or how they ended up there. 

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Although comparing ourselves can be easy, it can be damaging. If we are unsatisfied with our appearance, we may constantly look at other people with a desired, different appearance. It will lead into a cycle of, “Oh, I’m so ugly” or “Oh, I’m so large” while we endlessly scroll.

Social media has made it hard to not compare ourselves. We see what we like, and we want to become that. It may be comparing how much money we have, how many followers we have, how our body sizes differ, and more. 

Identify that negative critic in your mind. They are telling you that you aren’t good enough. Learn how to conquer that negative self talk. Once you take control of your thoughts, anything is possible. 

Negative thoughts come and go through our mind, and it’s important to know that they don’t mean anything. Thoughts can be random and hurtful, but it doesn’t mean they are true. When we don’t give into our negative thoughts, we take control over them.

If someone else has more desirable qualities about themselves, try to understand why you don’t appreciate your own qualities. It all comes down to how you genuinely feel about yourself, and not others.

Depression therapy in Simi Valley, Ca will help you break the cycle of negative thinking.

Journal on a regular basis

Practice gratitude for yourself by journaling. I know what you’re thinking, journaling, really? I feel like it’s a popular coping mechanism offered to people. Although it can seem unattractive and tedious, you can make it a personal experience. And it really does work!

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When we acknowledge things we love about ourselves, we will start to repeat it and believe it. If you’re telling yourself over and over how much you hate yourself, obviously you will continue to hate yourself. Nothing will really change. You may just find more to pile on top of yourself. 

However, when you visualize self love, you will attain self love. Make it a habit for at least a week straight. Don’t commit to anything longer if you truly believe you won’t catch on. Have a journal right by your bedside. Right when you wake up or right when you are about to fall asleep, journal.

List out 3 things you appreciate about yourself. This could be about your personality, your attitude, or appearance. Maybe you appreciate your self awareness. Your hair. Or your long eyelashes. Your stretch marks. Your beard stubble. Or, your positive, optimistic point of view on life. Your resourcefulness in stressful situations.

When you continue to point out things you appreciate about yourself, more and more will come up for you. Insecurities will come and go, but you will be able to counter them.

Learn how to be the boss of your anxiety and start loving yourself more. Anxiety can make us feel like a burden or annoyance. Take control of that negativity today and start seeing real change unfold.

Depression therapy for teens in Simi Valley, Ca helps your child find their inner strengths to appreciate them!

HOW TO LOVE YOURSELF:Talk kindly to yourself

Saying things like “ugh, can’t believe you messed up again” can put us in a bad mood. It can leave us feeling negative about ourselves. What if we flipped the narrative to “it’s okay to make mistakes”. Doesn’t that just feel better to think about?

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It’s understandable if you want to push yourself to be the best version possible. But you don’t have to do that with self-bullying. We may view ourselves and think, “ew, I hate how my hair looks today” and feel crushed by our appearance. What if we said “maybe I could learn this new styling technique” instead? Even if we don’t get it down the first time, we are avoiding the negativity.

It’s okay to be embarrassed or ashamed about past mistakes. Mistakes are learned lessons, and we wouldn’t be where we are today without them. Break free from the guilt and forgive yourself. This can look like saying, “I forgive myself for what I did”. “That was in the past, and I am a new person now. I am excited for the growth that’s yet to come!”

Practice giving yourself compliments, even if you feel like you’re being fake to yourself. Even if you don’t believe you look cute, just say it. Look at yourself in the mirror and say, “Wow, I’m lookin’ good today!”. Strike a poser in the mirror. Compliment your appearance or makeup. 

Basically, just be kind to yourself. You won’t get very far in loving yourself if you keep talking negatively. Say compliments even if you don’t mean them. You will start to believe them. Accept yourself for who you are in the process. 

Online therapy with Simi Psychological Group for depression therapy with a Simi Valley therapist will support you to find the hidden reasons why you should love yourself.

Cut anyone out of your life who puts you down

It’s time to rid negativity once and for all. Do you have a “friend” who constantly tries to embarrass you? Make jokes on your appearance or personality? Maybe they use you to try to look cooler themselves? 

Maybe you have a family member who doesn’t understand you. They even judge you for certain things. By not agreeing with you or your lifestyle, they shame you for it. Family gossip may spread around, leaving you feeling ashamed for who you are. How unfair is that? It’s important to learn to set boundaries with those that make you feel this way. You are teaching yourself that you matter first and foremost.

If people in your life do not respect you, they may continue to put you down. You don’t need to please anyone when it comes from an insecure place. No one deserves to have a say in how you should feel about yourself (other than loving yourself). If someone makes you feel sad, ashamed, or embarrassed of yourself, say GOODBYE. This can mean literally saying goodbye or setting boundaries so you don’t take it in to mean a message about you.

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It’s not worth the relationship if it’s toxic and harmful. You are much better off replacing their spot with someone who genuinely cares for you. Someone who wants to see you thrive and live your best life. You don’t need anyone who just wants to control your perceptions.

Do what’s best for you, bestie. It can hurt to let people go, but it will hurt more to let people bring you down. And remember – love yourself, you’re worth it.

Depression therapy in person near Thousand Oaks, Ca, will be your vessel of support to guide you towards self love.

Now Offering Online Therapy in Los Angeles and Online Counseling Ventura County 
At our therapy practice in Simi Valley, Ca we offer Child therapy and family counseling, Teen therapy, Anxiety Treatment, Depression Therapy, Marriage Counseling, and Neuropsychological Testing.

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