How to Rebuild Trust in a Relationship

Having trust in a relationship doesn’t always have to do with cheating or infidelity. Trust in a relationship could relate to trusting your partner with your pets, your money, or your life! It’s important that you are spending time and creating bonds with people you trust till the end.

When we trust someone, we feel comfortable with not only them, but also ourselves. We feel like we don’t need to hide who we truly are anymore. We can feel confident in our own skin, knowing they have our back. There’s no need to fear your partner finding someone else, because you trust that they wouldn’t do that to you. Or, you trust that they would go about things the right way.

Trust is very valuable and important in relationships. Without trust, things can be very difficult to navigate. A relationship lacking trust can oftentimes leave partners feeling drained, frustrated, and emotional. When our relationship is full of trust, we feel relaxed, worryfree, and confident in both ourselves and our partner!

Whether you are just starting out a relationship, or are looking to rebuild trust in your relationship, this is the blog for you! Real change can happen, starting with you. Maybe you have been fighting with your partner recently, and want that to change.

How to Rebuild Trust in a Relationship: Communicate your insecurities

Here are tips on how to better communicate with your partner.

You are wanting to rebuild trust in your relationship. It’s time to lay everything out on the table that you are insecure about. Not the easiest show of your true colors, but it’s important to do so! By getting to know each other’s insecurities or triggers, you can avoid any unnecessary conflicts or fights in the future. You will be able to handle things maturely and reasonably to come to a resolution. 

Maybe your insecurities are that you worry they will find another partner. This is a very common insecurity to have. However, when it’s not discussed in a healthy, positive way, insecurities can be detrimental to relationships. Showing insecurities through harmful behavior such as violating privacy, making accusations, or being mean won’t properly address the topic at hand. 

Another insecurity may be that you fail to trust people with things that are important to you – whether it be your animals, plants, or other errands/responsibilities. You may feel content handling everything yourself, feeling like no one could do as good of a job as you. 

Trust has to do with a lot of things – not just infidelity or cheating. We want to be able to trust people with our animals, for instance. And, if you don’t feel very trustworthy, you can lay it out on the table. “I don’t feel comfortable leaving you to care for my animals just yet. I want to see that you know how to feed them, provide them water, and let them out to go to the bathroom”, for example.

After communicating about your insecurities, come up with a game plan for communicating about them when you feel triggered or upset. Practice healthy, positive communication with one another. Now that your partner knows that makes you feel insecure, what can they do to make you feel secure? Asking yourself questions to develop more awareness can help you communicate more with your partner.

This will help you rebuild trust in your relationship and open up the doors to more connection and intimacy.

Marriage counseling in Simi Valley, Ca, can help you understand where communication is lacking in the relationship.

How to Rebuild Trust in a Relationship: Show that you can be trusted through actions, not words

Words don’t mean nearly as much as our actions. We can talk up a storm, using meaningful words or stories to get our point across. By apologizing, we can explain what we will do differently next time. However, we need to match our words up to our actions.

If we are constantly going against our words, it will be very difficult to build trust together. It’s important to show what you mean through your actions. This looks like if you said you would work on being aware of your tone in arguments, you lower your tone as soon as you notice it. 

Maybe your partner is wanting you to hold yourself accountable for your actions and apologize on their own. It’s important that you are also wanting to rebuild the trust in your relationship. And that you are wanting to prove that through your actions.

Here is a guide on what to do when you feel jealous.

Admitting your faults and what you want to do to change them is a great idea. It could be that you lack a sense of balance with work, social life, personal time, and your relationship. Therefore, that sometimes can put a strain on your relationship. However, there are definitely steps you can take to create the life you want to live. You have the power to do what you believe is right.

Couples therapy in person in Simi Valley, Ca, can help you understand many ways you can build trust through actions.

How to Rebuild Trust in a Relationship: Consider couples counseling

Here is a guide to help understand when to start couples counseling.

At the end of the day, it’s always a great idea to have someone provide outside insight to what’s going on. Couples therapists are experienced in being able to support the both of you at the same time. They will work with you to understand your present concerns and desired outcomes for therapy.

It’s a great idea to go into couples therapy with goals you have for yourself. It could be that you’d like to communicate your feelings better. Maybe you want to achieve a greater level of patience with your partner. Perhaps you want to learn how to trust them again!

If you feel like you and your partner aren’t communicating effectively about things, have a third party mediate your conversations. They will be able to pick up on tones, body language, and understanding how you are feeling. 

When we argue with our partners, it’s unlikely that they will put aside their feelings to hear us out and care for us. We all want to feel heard and understood, which is difficult to experience in a heated argument. 

By including a couples therapist in the mix, they will be able to validate your concerns while guiding you to proper solutions. You know that you want to feel confident and secure in your relationship. Obtaining tools for coping mechanisms and to strengthen communication can do wonders for you and your partner!

Couples counseling is a great idea for when you seem to continuously agree to disagree about things!

More about Simi Psychological Group

Now Offering Online Therapy in Los Angeles and Online Counseling Ventura County 

At our therapy practice in Simi Valley, Ca we offer Child therapy and family counseling, Teen therapy, Anxiety Treatment, Depression Therapy, Marriage Counseling, and Neuropsychological Testing.